The past year with covid and stay at home has challenged me no doubt.  I’ve not been grounded this long but have hope we will travel again to discover the world.  This is a favorite post and I’m sharing it hoping you find the love you want and deserve this year.  Be Well. Stay Strong. Know that You are Not Alone. 

When I was in college, Valentine’s Day was a day the professors dreaded.  They knew the chances of teaching an uninterrupted class was impossible as the University Singers, the accapella group, would be knocking to sing a lucky girl a song or two.  This was their yearly fundraiser and kids used it to profess love, cause embarrassment or just disrupt classes (the odd song to the boys). I always wanted to be the recipient of the singing telegram but never was.  For many friends, the singers were torture, a reminder to be alone at Valentine’s Day, they started their own Anti-Valentine’s Day group (they all had their white weddings, 2.5 kids, a dog and the picket fence dream).

Flash forward five years after college graduation, when my friend was escaping her single status in the U.S. and we went to Paris for Valentine’s Day.  It didn’t end well…..she left me in Paris, years before the internet and cell phone (yes, there was a time neither existed – hard to imagine).  That’s my solo travel origin story , and my anniversary date, which is funny and sad.  Not only did we escape the U.S. because we were “still single and unattached” but I was now alone in Paris for the first time.  I made the scary decision to stay and figure it out on my own, my first time as a solo traveler – no tour group, no friends,  just me.  I didn’t tell my parents until I was home and they naturally freaked out because girls back then didn’t travel alone. Nevermind that I was probably 25 years old at the time, it was still taboo.  To put this in perspective, when I moved out from my parent’s home to my house, my father didn’t talk to me for weeks because I wasn’t married and he worried about who would take care of me? who would protect me?

Now more than twenty years after that Paris abandonment, I’ve traveled the world to nearly fifty countries.  My father eventually talked to me and realized that I’m ok on my own.  He then told me “I raised you to be independent and did such a great job, I probably scared the guys away” (perhaps). We would laugh about the crazy stories from the road like the many “Where is Your Husband” questions and make the list of Roommate Questions.

Here’s the thing about Valentine’s Day – marketing and social media has hit you over the head so much that you think Hallmark movies, Red Roses (ugh!  be original) and Chocolate are a requirement or you are unloved (Spoiler Alert: that’s not true).  So it’s understandable if you are alone and get a bit depressed.  I’m against only one day of love – flowers, chocolates, cards, spa days, etc. – attention should be a regular occurrence.  So while Cupid somehow frequently forgets me, I choose to celebrate each year as my Solo Travel Anniversary, one that has blessed me with my longest relationship – the one with my passport which has allowed me to Date the World. I  continue to discover new adventures near and far, meet some cool and interesting people and marvel at the animals.

This year, I will celebrate Valentine’s Day absent romantic love (due to closed borders) but still with love – all the love that traveling solo for over twenty years has taught me –

love of the world – love of chocolate in Bruges – love of flowers in Amsterdam – love of discovery

love of adventure in Iceland – love of new cultures in Botswana – love of finding new friends on cruises

love of celebrating differences – love of tolerance – love of acceptance – love of self discovery at Red Mountain Spa

love of trying scary things in New Zealand –  love of the Great Ocean Road in Melbourne (Australia)

love of luxury spas – love of boutique hotels – love of high thread count

love of staycations in Philly – love of wine in the Yarra Valley – love of luxury hotels in Gozo

love of London – love of Paris views – love of first class flights on British Airways and luxury airport lounges at LHR

love of saying yes – love of knowing when to say no

love of points trips to Easter Island and so much more.

Travel continues to teach me new things and the only exam I need to take involves keeping an open mind and open heart so I can expand my mind, my experiences and my relationships.  The professor is no longer my only teacher and sadly the cute guys aren’t singing my love song but there’s still a knock on the door to the world and what a fantastic classroom to learn from.  I’ve not given up hope but I’m not sitting still waiting either – there too much to discover in the world.

So if you are alone this Valentine’s Day, find something you love and be thankful.  This year, I’m going to toast to Paris, that fateful trip over twenty years ago that allowed me to be brave and carry on.  I brought a mini bottle of Moet & Chandon Rose home from my Epernay Champagne Cellar Tour .  It seems apropos to enjoy my anniversary with the good stuff.

So whatever you choose to celebrate (or not) Valentine’s Day, I hope you realize that you are still writing your own story.  Your leading man (or woman) might not have shown up yet but that doesn’t mean you can’t love the world and all it has to offer.

How do you celebrate Valentine’s Day and what (or who) do you love?